Sashas Adventure
by Abigailfanfics
Summary: Simple farm girl Sasha‘s world is turned upside down when she’s visited by harry potter himself and with the help of a few unlikely friends she must save the wizarding world!
1. Chapter 1

once upon a time there was a girl named Sasha Brown. she lived an average life on her farm and was EXTREMELY SOUTHERN (XD). she had light brown hair cascading down her shoulders in soft ringlets. she had an intense jaw bone and could pull of blue steel (zoolander) like it was nothing. her eyes, were hazel and glimmered like a shimmering star. currently she was wearing a puce crop top that said "#FRESH" on it and a pleated long skirt with several puppies crocheted into it. she also wore a dazzling blood red broach that she found in the field one cold afternoon and hadn't taken of since (even to shower and sleep. it was part of her now). one day she was sitting outback drinking a parsley soda when someone pulled up in a mustered yellow G-wagon. a tall boi of approximately 17 stepped out of the gorgeous car. he had dark windswept hair and small round spectacles that slid down the bridge of his nose in the southern heat. he had a jagged lighting bolt scar on his forehead . he wore a designer suit that was made completely out of shrews. he did look quite handsome she had to admit. she was just imagining what their children would look like when a female stepped out from behind him. she looked a bit younger than him and had long flowing red hair. she was wearing a dress paige had seen everywhere online handcrafted by the one and only mugatu. she was fairly sure he used child labourers to make it but that didn't matter. the mystery boi put his arm around a certain red headed lassy. just as Sasha was losing help. the final figure emerged from the G-Wagon.

Sasha spit out her parsley soda.

he was everything she could have ever dreamed of. his white blond hair seemed to be glowing. his superior stature was prominent. he was wearing a tight black sweater and a bright neon green kilt. paige quickly regained her composure and began to hope and pray that she looked presentable .

the boi with the dark hair spoke, "hello, Sasha Brown"

"how do you know my name?" Sasha stammered

"you are known by many in the wizarding world." he declared

"b-but why??" Sasha questioned

"because of that!" he said pointing to her chest.

"my tits?" she said confused but very proud.

"NO!" he scowled, "your broach you dumb prick!"

"oh." she said , somewhat disappointed, "it's a simple mistake i️ suppose. but what's so special with my broach?"

the blond boi spoke up

"we believe that this broach has been infused with a special substance that is crucial to the wizarding world."

he had a soothing voice , Sasha thought.

"what is it? the substance i️ mean?" she inquired

"shreks blood." the redhead stated

"wicked!" Sasha said

"you remind me of someone" the dark haired boi chuckled

"hm. i️ thought shreks blood was green!" Sasha said

"don't be racist you swine!" the redhead girl said

"let me introduce us." the dark haired boi said, "i️ am harry potter, this is the lovely ginny," he gestured towards the redhead, "and this is draco malfoy" he said pointing to the blond one.

oooh draco... Sasha thought... what an edgy name...

"quickly " draco said, "we have to return to the wizarding world!"

"why don't you just take the broach?" Sasha asked

"you'll find that you can't remove it" draco said slowly

"w-w-what" she said in her thick southern accent.

she tried to remove the broach but it wouldn't budge. come to think of it, she'd never actually attempted to remove it.

"but..but i'm just a nobody from south carolina!" she said

"no. you're so much more than that." draco said

Sasha felt a slow blush creep onto her face. she smiled softly.

they got to the wizarding world. it was beautiful. nothing like Sasha's home in south carolina. they brought her a room where they introduced her to a couple people .

clary, jace, hermione, ron, and neville.

she was annoyed that they were all coupled up. harry and ginny, clary and jace, hermione and ron, and neville and the cactus. only draco remained.

"we are the elite. we had to join forces in order to save our worlds!" clary said. Sasha liked her. perhaps they would become friends.

"sounds nifty ! but how?" Sasha said

they all stared at her

"so you're the chosen one" jace drawled ignoring her question.

"NO IM THE CHOSEN ONE!!!" screamed harry.

"give it a break mate, your time was many years ago, let someone else have the spotlight." ron exclaimed. he sounded as if he'd said this many times before.

"ron that was four months ago!" harry said, exasperated.

"shut up will you harry!" hermione said (with obvious affection though).

"we must combine forces to take the broach off" hermione said

"it seems to me as if the broach isn't the only thing being taken off around here." jace cut in, motioning towards neville who was getting busy with the cactus in the corner.

"why do we need him again?" clary asked exasperated

"comic relief" everyone said in unison."

they all used their powers to try to remove the broach but nothing worked

"ugggh" ginny groaned , "nothing will work"

"there's only one other option." draco said, " we must seek out the shrek himself "

"we will embark on our journey in a few short nights " harry said

"meanwhile, everyone will prepare" clary said.

"what about me???"Sasha interjected

"you can bunk with me" draco said

"DONT DO ANYTHING I️ WOULDNT DO" jace yelled.

draco rolled his eyes

everyone left the room except draco and harry. harry gave him a wink.

"gd'luck mate!" as he left the room leaving draco alone.

that night Sasha entered a room and found one large bed, not two.

draco entered.

much much later you could hear her whisper "what a sturdy wand you have draco. is it the 12 inch model?"

over the next few days the two became very close and decided that it was a forever thing.

they soon began their journey to shreks swamp. they walked through mud and fence tangles of vines and roots. Sasha could hear clary talking to jace "do you do math broooooooooo?" she said

Sasha wondered what that was about.

when they had almost completed their trip they bearded a rustling . they froze. a huge lemur jumped out. Sasha screamed

"WAIT NO!" neville screamed

"i️ know her ! that's

Emmmmmmeeelliaaa ! but she goes by Emma ! she got turned into a lemur!"

"how come we don't remember her ?" harry asked

"because you stupid griffindoors don't care about any house but your own " neville said

"oh. " harry said

"don't be rude " ginny exclaimed

neville shrugged and they directed their attention back to Emma

"can she talk?" Sasha asked

"OF COURSE SHE CAN!" neville was annoyed as ever. especially because he had to leave his cactus at home

"okay" Sasha said

they finally got to shreks house

"yo yo yo!!" they yelled

shrek opens the door.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP?!"

"this has to do with the broach" draco said , casting an adoring loo towards Sasha

the rest nodded and ginny exclaims the situation.

"okay. " shrek said "broach girl, come in."

"um okay" Sasha said winking at shrek and hoping no one would notice

they entered the house alone.

shrek said "they isn't any other way to do this"

"oh. you mean ... ooooh" Sasha

said

"but i'm happily married !!"

draco and her had an informant wedding two days ago.

shrek slid the ring off .

"there " he said "you're free"

"oh i️ feel free"

they got busy and the broach slipped off but they didn't notice.

a loud slam came from the roof and a squad of male models burst in!

"THAT BROACH IA OURS" derek shrieked

"WE NEED IT TO SAVE THE MALE MODEL INDUSTRY "

they stabbed shrek 34 times and left

To be continued


	2. Chapter 2

the bottom of the barrel

once upon a time there was an 11 year old named Emma . she was a witch and she's known so for a very long time so when she got her acceptance letter form hogwarts she wasn't surprised , only excited for the adventure that awaited her. after methodically packing her trunk with all the necessaries. she picked out the perfect outfit even though she would change into her robes soon. she wore a sky blue fur coat and underneath a dark orange sequinned tube top. she paired this with a high waisted grass skirt and moccasins (they were soooo in). she thought she looked very presentable and that the outfit gave everyone insight of her true colours. after a short drive she arrived at platform 9 3/4 and said a halfhearted farewell to her parents. she flipped them off as she boarded the train. what could they do anyways. she walked through the train looking for someone to sit with. her eyes fell on a boi with a mess of chestnut brown hair and buckteeth. he was wearing an alligator skin jumpsuit and light up sketchers. Emma always liked making friends with people who were below her. this kid was obviously at the bottom of the barrel ... maybe he wasn't even in the barrel. she sat next to him and introduced herself,

"hi! i'm Emelia Lewis, but you can call me Emma."

"hey," he said tentatively "i'm neville longbottom"

"EW!" she couldn't stop herself from saying "longbottom??"

he looked down

"sorry" she apologised, "ever consider changing your name legally?"

neville shrugged

"sorry didnt mean to get off on the wrong foot."

they talked for a while before neville shrieked in surprise

"MY TOAD"

Emma sighed, this could be a long school year.

when they got to school it was sorting time. she had a feeling neville would be a squib. she knew she was a ravenclaw. surprisingly neville got into griffendoor, shocking all. though they were in different houses, it didn't damage their friendship

four years later

neville had become slightly less awkward and the two had become very close. not as friends ...

the only problem was that Emma was embarrassed by neville and wanted to conceal their relationship.

"i️ really like you neville but i️ think we need to keep this under wraps" said Emma

"i️ don't understand" neville stated. he wanted the whole school to see he could actually get a girl and he wasn't the lamest out there. he had attracted bullies rather than hotties - and Emma was a hottie for sure. he liked what she wore on her days off when she didn't have to wear her uniform. she expressed herself. some of her outfits included a hotdog dress, a cotton ball smock, a gilly weed corset, and a giant crow hat. of course when she was wearing her robes, she adorned her hair with various objects and hats (she had unique hair styles too). one time she had even braided some of neville's hair into her own. he had liked that.

during christmas break, Emma went over to neville's house because her parents disowned her (she may of deserved it because she spent her free time forcing them to watch hours of jay hay the jet plane) neville went to the bathroom and she was alone with his grandmother. she seemed like a crabby old lady but Emma was into older people anyways.

"i️ must teach you a lesson" she said suddenly

"what?"

"you think he is an embarrassment" she said firmly

"no no i️ dont .. it's just ... the barrel.. i️ wouldn't expect you to understand "

"i️ know very much about barrels thank you very much" augusta (neville's grandmother) yelled

"i️ studied barrels for six years !!!" Emma yelled back

"I️ DEVOTED MY ENTRIE LIFE TO STUDYING THE BARREL!!!!" augusta shot back

regaining her composure , augusta, who was now eerily calm, said "i️ will teach you a lesson, and this is for using my grandson and for challenging my barrel knowlage!"

"WAIT" Emma pleaded

"you will forever be at the bottom of the barrel" she said, grinning wildly

"NOOO"

"LEMURIOUSUS LEMURIUM!!!!!!!" augusta shouted in fury

and then, Emma was a lemur.

neville came back into the room.

"what's all this racket about," he asked "grandma? Emma?"

he looked at her in confusion and then Emma leaped out of the window, down down down 34 stories. she retreated to the wilderness. she slept that night, in the bottom of an empty barrel.

several years later she had finally grown used to being a lemur

that morning she was very far from neville's house now and wanted to go to town to get food. she ended up going to cowboi express and on her way she passed best western plus. oh how she wished to stay there. when she reached her destination she was casually sipping her orange chicken juice (well remind you she's still a lemur). she recognised a strange group that has entered through the exit of the store . she knew them as the most well known cult in europe, the muppets.

"we couldn't help but notice that your interesting composure for a muppet" kermit said

"i'm not a muppet" she said indignantly

"what are then a furry?!" gonzo inquires

"dear god no!" Emma replied

"JOIN OR DIE" miss piggy screeched

"ID RATHER DIE!" Emma yelled

"THEN YOU WILL PERISH IN OUR WRATH!" fozzie bear bellowed

she flipped them off as the walked out of the store

she had gotten down the street when she looked behind her quickly . to her surprise she say the muppets in a giant tank and they had huge rifles and began to fire at her

"WE ARE ANYTHING BUT NOT TRUE TO OUR WORD! YOU HAD A CHANCE TO JOIN US BUT ITS TOO LATE NOW !!"kermit screamed

as they chased her she lunged into the empty barrel. they passed without a second glance.

wow, she thought, being at the bottom of the barrel saved my life. maybe while studying barrels she was blind to the fact that being at the bottom of the barrel could be good? nah. she'd rather be at the top. her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of nine voices.

oh no she thought, those twats will blow my cover! she crept out of the barrel and accidentally stepped on some dry leaves which rusted beneath her. she jumped out of the dense tangle of trees and vines

there was a pretty girl with an immaculate broach on her chest that looked very familiar and she looked at Emma and screamed

"WAIT NO!" a voice she recognised yelled

neville ? she thought

oh no that wasn't good they had a short argument about her and left. she followed and hoped they wouldn't notice her. they stopped in front of shreks house and the brown haired girl was ushered in by the shrek himself. suddenly Emma remembered where she had seen the broach . Emma had spent much of her time researching what to do to make her not a lemur anymore and the broach had appeared many times. there's only one thing to do. she grabbed the phone she kept in her ear and dialled '343-434-3434'

"hellllloooo" and awfully familiar voice said cheerfully

"derek, hansal! i️ need your help!"

derek and hansal were male models and old friends of Emma

"it comes with the special revenge on a certain green creature "

"NO! the very one who beat us in the walk off?"

"yes. that one" Emma replied

"well be right there." they said together

shrek died and Emma the lemur was in the headquarters for dereks derelicte line.she crushed the broach and drank its contents

she turned back into Emma . she was naked and derek and hansal stared she rolled her eyes and demanded one of the derelicte designer dresses . she ended up wearing a dress made of the plastic found in a whales stomach and a meat carcass shawl. she lived being herself again.

she went off to seek out neville and after a while she found him

"Emma?? what? i️ thought you were a lemur?"

"yeha i️ was thanks to you" she said, her voice laced with venom

"i'm sorry i️ never meant for this to happen"

"I️ SPENT FOUR YEARS AS A BLOODY LEMUR YOU PRICK I️ COULD HAVE BEEN STUDYING BARRELS!!!" she screamed

"my grandma ... she gets upset when someone challenges her barrel knowlage . she - she always said that i️ was at the bottom of the barrel and no one at the top of it would want to associate with me ever. but i️ met you and now i️ feel like i'm at the top when you look at me! when i️ lost you i️ spent minutes looking for you! and i️ always used cacti after cacti to replace you and nothing could !"

they kissed then. Emma felt fine about it , besides, he did glow up.

just then the muppets had been getting busy in their tank if you know what i'm saying . they accidentally drove their tank into the house that neville and Emma were in. they died in seconds. the muppets emerged from their tank. kermit looked at Emma's corpse and said "we are anything but true to our word "

To be continued


	3. Chapter 3

prologue

eminem strolled across the sleek city streets. four body guards followed closely behind. new york was bustling with people as usual. today it was especially crowded. eminem rounded a corner and entered an almost stranded alleyway. voices of sketchy marketers crooned at him to purchase some of their goods. people told him to stay away from that place but it was his guilty pleasure. he say a shop that caught his eye and entered. it was filled with lots of antiques. he was about to leave when something caught his eye. the first edition bee movie dvd. he stared in awe. even he didn't have enough money to purchase items like this it would typically be 34 billion dollars. he reached out and opened it carefully. inside was not the disc but a bejewelled amber hairpin. the store owner -who was a giant frog- hopped over.

"it's barry b benson's magical bejewelled hairpin" he croaked

now eminem was always one to believe in stories so when he heard it was magical he knew he had to have it. now eminem wasn't usually one to steal but he didn't have any money on him or else he'd get tempted to buy a ton of useless stuff. he did the only sensible thing in his opinion. he ushered his body guard over and told him that this frog was trying to assault him so the guard beat the frog up and eminem ran away with the hairpin

many years later

croony longbottom was neville's long lost brother. they'd been separated at birth and croony had been on his own since he was two months old. no orphanages wanted to take him in. he hated neville with a burning passion because he didn't want to be associated with anyone who was at the bottom of the barrel. croony wanted to bring back Emma because he was jealous that neville actually has - had- a life. and yes, he had been stalking them. he'd been doing research and had found out about three pieces of jewellery that possessed great power. the first, a blood red broach made from shreks blood that had the ability to make someone human (though he had heard it had been destroyed) . the second, a bejewelled amber hairpin, made from barry b benson's honey. the third beaded anklet made of jacob sartorius' ashes, it could make a noise that could kill anyone in a 34 mile radius. croony wanted the hairpin very badly. he wanted to bring Emma back to life.

croony sought out someone who knew a lot about these three items. her name was gertrude, but she preferred to go by lil gert. she wore a leather suit with extreme shoulder pads and a plunging neckline. she wore tight black leather leggings and six inch heels.

"hello old friend" croony said quietly

"um.. do i know you?" lil gert asked

croony was somewhat hurt. they had had intimate relations in a closet once.

"croony? remember?" he said, exasperated.

"not a bit. now what do you want?" she inquired.

"i need to know everything you know about the amatye amandla (jewels of power) "

"the amatye huh... " lil gert said, "why should i help you?"

"i have something you want..." croony hinted

before she could respond, he pulled out the meat carcass shawl that he had taken off of Emma's dead body.

lil gerts lips parted in surprise.

"there's a footprint on it." she said

"oh that's from one of the muppets who danced on her dead body." croony answered sounding bored.

"hm." she responded and began inhaling the scent of the scarf.

"i wouldn't do that it's been on a dead body."

lil gert glared at him and ran her tongue across it defiantly.

"so do we have a deal?" croony asked between gags.

lil gert looked at the shawl wistfully and then answered "yes."

it had taken weeks of scheming but they had devised a good plan. they had purchased front row tickets for eminem's concert. they knew what they had to do.

the concert was wild. eminem wore some derelicte designer clothes and looked ravishing. finally the moment lil gert had been waiting for arrived. she hopped on stage and interrupted eminem midsong.

"lil gert?" he said confused

"yeah it's me" she nodded

"what do you want?" he asked

"i want that hairpin" she demanded

"why?"

"you know why"

eminem sighed.

"i'm not giving it to you." he said

"rap battle." lol gert challenged

eminem might have said no but this was lil gert. he stared in awe at her meat carcass shawl. besides, he couldn't say no in front of all his fans.

"if you insist."

it started off calm. the rapping was intense but not insane ... yet. 3.4 hours in, the rapping had gotten crazy. lil gerts afro was a wild tangle of deep blue and her mullet was stuck to the back of her head in the southern heat. eminem finally cracked.

lost for words he stared at his audience, but honestly most of them preferred lil gert. it was rappers honor, he couldn't not give her the hairpin. reluctantly he handed it over. there was a storm of applause when she slipped it into her pocket, jumped off stage and caught by croony who released her. they strutted our if the auditorium and the crowd parted in respect for lil gert.

to be continued


	4. Chapter 4

lil gert and croony made their way their way to croony's turf where he kept Emma's body. he had stuffed neville into the bottom of a barrel and planned to send it to augusta longbottom. gert handed him the hairpin, "you do the honors" she said sarcastically.

"gladly," he said ignoring her tone

he leaned close to Emma as he always dreamed of doing. he dreamed of her waking up and kissing him dramatically. lil gert would join. he sighed and slipped the hairpin into her sleek locks. her eyes fluttered open.

"WHO THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU?" she screamed

"i'm croony.. neville's brother."

"neville doesn't have a brother you prick!" she fired back

"yes he does!!!! and i'm him" he pleaded

Emma gasped, "LIL GERT?!"

she pushed past croony and hugged lil gert who returned the gesture

"hey sis!!! it's been a while!" lil gert exclaimed

"too long" Emma agreed

"you guys are sisters?" croony asked.

"no you stupid twat!!" they said in unison and laughed

"it's what you call best friends, duh!" Emma said

"well i brought you back to life!! it was my idea!" croony exclaimed

"actually," lil gert interjected " i was the one who beat eminem in a rap battle and therefore saved Emma ."

"thank you so much lil gert. i knew i could always depend on you!" Emma said

croony felt a pang if jealousy.

"wait a minutes," Emma said "where's neville, you brought him back too right?"

"well," lil gert said, "croony- the selfish bastard- refused to bring his own brother back."

"what! where is he!" Emma said

"he's in the closet and literally at the bottom of the barrel." croony said

"you idjit! i've just met you but it's clear you don't care about anyone but yourself." Emma spat at him

before Emma could head to the closet croony lunged and grabbed the barrel. he ran outside and threw the barrel in the outdoor fire pit. it disintegrated and he inhaled the ashes of his brother, but in doing so , also inhaled the smoke from the fire and passed out.

after they had tied croony up, Emma and lil gert were able to relax.

"i'm gonna call up a friend. you'll like her i'm nearly positive."

"great!" Emma said

soon afterwards, Sasha arrived.

"hey i know you! you're that girl from the jungle" Emma said

"huh?" Sasha said smiling

"i'm the lemur" Emma said casually

"oh ! ooohhhh! of course! we may have gotten off on the wrong foot but i'm sure well make the best of friends" Sasha said

Emma was silent for a second, remembering when she said that to neville the first time they spoke. eh whatever.

"wicked" she replied

they all became besties very fast

they were shocked by the sound of a moan.

croony was awake.

"i challenge you to a dance battle" he slurred, " and of i win you'll set me free"

the three girls glanced at eachother.

"okay!" they said , knowing they wouldn't let him go either way.

"to make it fair," Emma said, "you can call up two people to dance with you." lil gert finished Emma's sentence.

"hurry up" Sasha said

croony quickly called up jacob sartorius and eminem.

the dance battle was epic.

unfortunately after 10 minutes, croony passed out from exhaustion. they tied him up while dancing. after another 10 eminem jumped out the window and jacob just died .

later that evening lil gert, Sasha and Emma slipped into bed.

croony heard all and dies of jealousy.

although there were no wands, it was a truly magical night.


	5. Chapter 5

This is a mostly/ somewhat true story of how this fanfiction might have been created (I added a bit of immagination). Also I will be continuing this story and I might mix this world with the fanfiction one later on... just a warning.

Part 1- the beginning:

Veronica ran up to her friends in a small circle, huddled by a tree. Her friends were playing a song they made, and were all clapping and singing along with glee. Penelope turned the song off and took a deep breath.

"So, who's excited for the field trip?" she asked excitedly.

"I'm pretty sure I speak for all of us when I say all of us are," Veronica laughs. "The bus ride is going to be hard though, especially in this Southern heat." They live in central California.

"Agreed." Everyone nods in unison, like a cult agreeing on a new ritual. Penelope looks around at the members in the group.

There was Sasha, the peppy person that everyone wants to sit next to on the bus, Emelia, the one who is lowkey a stalker to everyone, Janine, the spunky tall one, Debra, the paranoid one, Lisa, the one who makes everyone smile, Kelly, the baby of the group, and Angelina, the one who teases everyone in a friend-like manner.

Everyone stood and waited impatiently for the busses to arrive. Veronica's glasses kept sliding down the bridge of her nose in the southern heat. She pushed them back frustratedly and crossed her arms.

"What's wrong?" Penelope asked.

"I just don't get it. It's 8:40 AM and the busses STILL haven't gotten here!" Veronica exclaimed in a mighty rage. Penelope rolled her almond eyes and brushed her light blonde hair to the side.

"Tell me about it. And the southern heat it making my hair stick to the back of my neck." She said. Veronica scratched at her dirty blonde hair and turned to her left sharply. She rolled her stormy blue-grey eyes.

"Ugh. Look. It's THOSE bois." She rolled her eyes and slumped against a tree trunk. The bois. You know, those ones.

There were four of them, 3 of which were single, and one that was dating none other than Kailee, and let's just say Kailee was OBSESSED with her man.

"Hey Jacob!" She cheered, her bouncy curls bouncing behind her as she bounced over to her boyfriend. She pecked his lips and he pecked back, reluctantly.

"Hey babe," Jacob Sartorius caresses her shoulder gently. Her expression changes and her face turns a little more red than before. He whispers something into her ear and her face goes from red to as bright red as her boyfriend's cheeks. She pushes him jokingly.

"Babe! You can't say that here!" She blushes. He scratches the back of her neck comfortingly. Penelope rolls her eyes. Veronica rolls her eyes.

"Omigod EW." Veronica exclaims, turning her back to the reddest couple in the world. Penelope still watches though. There's something fishy going on and Penelope's smelling a seafood buffet.

"Jacob, dude, you ready to play Fortnite the whole way there AND back?" A boi in Jacob's group touches his shoulder, and stands a little bit closer than most people stand next to others.

"Yeah bro, but one minute." Jacob rubs the boi's shoulder and takes both of Kailee's shoulders, pushing her away from the other boi for a moment.

"Babe, listen. You mean a lot to me but I want to play Fortnite with my dudes. Talking won't keep me satisfied the whole ride there AND back." He says, his thumb caressing Kalea's shoulder. Kailee rolls her eyes.

"I know babe, it's just, I feel like you've been spending more time with the bois than you have with ME. Do you see the problem? What happened to your romantic side?" Jacob turns a ballerina pink, but Kailee doesn't seem to notice.

"Look babe, I just need...a break. It can't just be you you you all the time." Jacob says, stroking her ear.

"WHAT?!" Kailee pushes Jacob, tears welling in her eyes. "YOU DON'T LOVE ME?" Everyone is looking at the two now.

"No, babe it's not that, it's-"

"YOU DON'T LOVE-" Kailee's cut off by a long kiss from Jacob Sartorious. The busses pull into the parking lot and they waltz into bus 1, their lips still touching. Penelope stifles a gag but Veronica can't.

"They make me feel sick inside." Veronica shudders.

"They make me feel sick OUTSIDE too." Penelope rolls her eyes. The group files into Bus 1 and takes their seats. Jacob's next to one of his bros. Strange. Wouldn't he be sitting next to his girlfriend?

Penelope and Veronica sit in the row in front of Jacob and his friend, just diagonal from Kailee, who's on the other side behind her.

"OMIGOD I HAVE A GENIUS IDEA." Veronica screeches.

"No screaming!" The bus driver yells as he fastens his hat to his head. Mr. S chuckles and pats the bus driver's shoulder. The bus driver looks back and gives him a toothy smile. Veronica rolls her eyes.

"What I was SAYING was that we should write a fanfiction!!!" Veronica cheers. Penelope rolls her eyes.

"Ew. Fanfictions are always awful."

"But that's the thing!" Veronica exclaims. "Let's make such a horrible one, it's actually GOOD." She smiles. A smile creeps up Penelope's face.

"But who shall be our victims?" Penelope asks. Veronica rolls her eyes but then chortles. She points across the isle at Sasha and Emelia. Penelope rolls her eyes.

"But what will we have to work with?" Penelope taps her chin. Veronica rolls her eyes.

"Isn't it obvious? Include rappers AND Harry Potter AND Shrek!" She exclaims.

"Okay, let's begin," Penelope grinned. Penelope pulled out her phone and went onto the notes app. She began to type swiftly, but with lots of accuracy.

"Once upon a time there was a girl names sasha. she lived an average life on her farm and was EXTREMELY SOUTHERN (XD)." The story read. Southern farm girl Sasha.

"Make her have a magical broach!" Veronica whispered excitedly. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Why?" She asked.

"It'll be important to the plotline!" Veronica exclaimed.

"We don't have a plotline," Penelope reminded her.

"Just add the broach." Veronica pleaded.

"Fine, but it's made out of Shrek's blood." Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Even better!" Veronica smiled. Penelope kept typing, including the broach as a key component to their story. Veronica looked over her behind her and noticed Jacob Saratorios and his friends were already playing Fortnite. She rolled her eyes and turned back around to see what Penelope had typed.

"Can I type for a little bit?" Veronica asked hopefully. Penelope passed the phone and Veronica began to type.

"Why do you type so slow?" Penelpe inquired. Veronica rolled her eyes.

"It's not my fault I'm a slow typer!" Veronica shrugged. Penelope snatched the phone back and continued to type two times Veronica's pace. Veronica slumped back into her seat, arms crossed. She pulled out her phone aggressively and opened her messages to find she had one from Debra. It was the infamous monkey emoji. Oh how Veronica hated that monkey emoji. Every time she saw it she felt like gouging someone's eyes out. She felt like murdering everyone. She HATES that monkey emoji. It's creepy eyes and odd textured face and awkward squat make it the worst emoji in history. Veronica felt like gouging her own eyes out, but instead she just rolled her eyes and disliked the horrid image. She shuddered and turned her phone off, slipping it back into her pocket. She looked over Penelope's shoulder to see how much she typed.

"one day she was sitting outback drinking a parsley soda when someone pulled up in a mustered yellow G-wagon. a tall boi of approximately 17 stepped out of the gorgeous car. he had dark windswept hair and small round spectacles that slid down the bridge of his nose in the southern heat." The story read.

"Amazing. Is the misspelling of mustard purposeful or accidental?" Veronica inquired. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Purposeful, why would I not know how to spell mustard?" She asked, crossing her arms. Beronica shrugged. Penelope rolled her eyes. Veronica looked over at Sasha and Emelia who were either listening to music or watching a video and she grinned. They have no idea what's coming.

Veronica and Penelope finish Part 1 of the story

"Here Sasha," Veronica passes the phone to Sasha and she chortles.

"What in the heck is this?" Sasha inquired.

"A fanfiction." Penelope responded coolly. Sasha gasped.

"About me??" Sasha asked, she seemed a bit shocked, and annoyed.

"Yep." Veronica smiled.

"Oh god." Sasha pinched the bridge of her nose. The southern heat was giving her a headache. She began to read it aloud and Jamine and Debra listened in. They all laughed and acted shocked in unison throughout the reading. There were some questionable scenes in the first page, but Sasha read them smoothly without a break, except for to laugh or glare at Penelope and Veronica. When they finished reading, Debra, Emelia, and Janine were all laughing about what they heard, and Sasha was blushing furiously.

"Penelope this is awful? I mean, with DRACO??" She snapped. Veronica and Penelope stifled a laugh, but it was clear on their faces what they were holding back from. However, in minutes everyone, including Sashabegan quoting it.

Behind Veronica and Penelope, Jacob Sartiarorious and his friends played Fortnite.

"GOD DAMNIT SECOND PLACE!" One yells and pouts.

"It's okay," Jacob says coolly, his hand stroking the other boi's thigh. They both blushed slightly.

"WOAH. NOT SAFE FOR WORK! NSFW!!!" Beronica thought with a shudder. The boi reached his arm through the gap in the seat and held his homie's hand. Jacob fixes one of the boi's hair.

"What the hell?" Penelope thought. She rolled her eyes. kailee looks over at Jacob Saitoriuos and a pang of jealousy is visible on her face. She conceals it well though, but Penelope can see right through it. The squad begins another round of Fortnite, but the sensual tension between them certainly isn't new.

The bus ride there was more dramatic than they thought, especially in the Southern heat.

To be continued


	6. Chapter 6

**Authors note- I might have combined reality with my fanfic... i'm just gonna go with it.**

Lil Gert passes impatiently back and forth, her mullet sticking to the back of her neck in the Southern heat.

"Is it almost ready?" She asks to no one in particular. The scientists in her lab shake their heads, and Lil' Gert slams her hand on a desk, shattering a glass of apple juice. Her veins bulge in her muscular arms. One scientist runs and cleans up the spill with a paper towel and sets another glass of apple juice on the table. Lil Gert sniffs it and launches it across the room.

"IT NEEDS TO BE DONE NOW!" She screams, pounding her fist on the already broken glass.

"Gertrude, we're doing everything we can." A scientist assures her.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" Lil Gert takes a deep breath and regains her focus. "We have no room for error, understand?" She threatens a hooded figure. The hooded figure nods.

"Of course Lil Gert. I'll make sure it's done by this afternoon." They say.

"Good. If it's not I'll know who to punish." Lil Gert nods. The hooded figure bows their head and Lil Gert trots out in her 6 inch platform heels, her long olive green cape trailing behind her heels. The hooded figure bowed their head in shame, and then ran off to finish up what Lil Gert needed.

The project is finished

Lil Gert stormed into the hallway wearing her return outfit. A pitch black jumpsuit with a long midnight cape, and she could never look more stunning. Her cape flapped in the wind and she marched through the indoor hallways to the laboratory. Her 10 inch platform heels were barely competition for the black headdress she wore atop her head. She wiped the sweat from the southern heat off her brow and marched on.

Lil Gert opened the door to find a large glowing blue circle.

"It's finished." The hooded figure stated.

"Good." Lil Gert said, passing the hooded figure a ruby red object from out of her jumpsuit belt, and linked arms with the hooded figure. She marched up to the strange thing and nodded.

"Finally," Lil Gert began "we'll get what we've both wanted for so long." The hooded figure nodded in return and the two jumped through the portal.

Swamp

Lil Gert and the hooded figure find themselves in a swamp, Shrek's swamp. They waltz over to the door and bust it open, finding Shrek dead with many stab wounds. The hooded figure rushed to Shrek's side and touched the ruby to his chest, allowing millions of golden flowers to grow and disappear, healing his wounds. Shrek wakes with a gasp.

"What? Who? Who are you? WHAT ARE YOU DOIN IN MAH SWAMP?" Shrek screams.

"It's me Shrek!" The hooded figure lifts the hood off their head. "Fiona!" Shrek blinks multiple times.

"It can't be true. You, you were dead!" He exclaims. Fiona rolls her eyes.

"You were dead too!" She exclaimed. Shrek and Fiona threw themselves into each other, making out sloppily and intensely. Lil Gert rolled her eyes and cleared her throat just as Shrek's collarbone was being revealed. Fiona pulled herself off of Shrek and brushed off her clothes.

"I sealed my end of the deal Fiona, your turn." Lil Gert recalls. Fiona rolls her eyes. She kisses Shrek one last time and runs back through the portal to the lab. The scientists recalibrate, and the two are off again.

To be continued


	7. Chapter 7

Everyone loaded off the bus and Janine's mom, Karen, took a head count and passed everyone in the group their stickers. Veronica and Penelope were ready to take off and see some exciting sights. Everyone else seemed excited as well. They all got an introduction of the place and then they were off. The teenagers stampeded into the building, trampling any 5-year-olds in their way.

"Ugh. I wish no one else was here." Veronica groaned. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"That's impossible to ask for." Penelope responded.

"Nothing's impossible," Veronica retorted.

"So, I'll keep dreaming on." Penelope rolled her eyes.

The two wandered the museum aimlessly, trying out exhibits and looking at fascinating items. They wandered into the light and color area and played with some colors and the shadow box room, then wandered more. Suddenly, a very soft moan was heard from inside a photo booth like thing. Veronica and Penelope looked at each other in shock and ducked behind a desk in hopes that whatever couple was in there didn't hear them eavesdropping. A few sighs from the people inside were let out and then someone poked his head out of the curtain slightly. Jacob Sartortitouts.

Veronica and Penelope slapped their hands over their mouths to display their shock that only each other could see. Jacob scanned the area and waved someone out.

"Must be Kailee," Veronica whispered to Penelope. To their surprise, Kailee did not exit the booth. Instead, the other three Fortnite guys exited the booth and Veronica and Penelope began shaking with shock.

"Oh... my... god..." Penelope couldn't move. The bois breathed heavily and wandered off to another exhibit.

"Were they..?" Veronica inquired. Penelope closed her eyes and pursed her lips, nodding. The two quickly sprinted across the room to the movie theater where no one was and gasped heavily.

"What the hell?!" Penelope thought out loud.

"Jacob Sattaydprfiis is cheating on Kailee with THREE other people!" Veronica exclaimed. The two couldn't believe the words coming out of their mouths. They sat in silence for a while, pondering what they saw and heard.

"Do we tell Kailee ?" Penelope asked. Veronica rolled her eyes.

"Don't you understand Penelope ? We can't tell ANYONE about this!" Veronica yelled, alerting everyone nearby that they have a secret. Veronica clapped her hand over her mouth and took deep breaths.

"We gotta go..." Penelope stated, glancing around suspiciously. She stood and pulled Veronica up and the two walked like moms on black friday as far away from the theater and the Ghost In Your Eyes exhibit as possible.

They found an exhibit somewhere central in the museum and sat down in two stools in front of a screen. They plopped some headphones on their heads and glued their eyes to the screen. A video began of a middle-aged couple arguing. This was when Veronica finally glanced at the title of the exhibit. She couldn't read it because her glasses slid to far down her face in the Southern heat, but it did say Marriage Counseling on it. Three clips played and then asked the girls to guess which argument was fake. Penelope and Veronica both guessed the third one, and they were correct.

"We should be marriage counselors." Penelope flipped her hair. Veronica rolled her eyes.

"Penelope, have you forgotten that we're not adults ."

"Right. But in the future if you need a job..." Veronica rolled her eyes again. The two stayed at the booth and played the little quiz over and over again to pass the time.

Meanwhile

Jacob Sarrtorriuous and his "friends" sniffed around the movie theater like dogs.

"I know I heard people in here. I know they saw us." He crossed his arms.

"Forget it Jacob, maybe you were just hallucinating." One boi shrugged. Jacob held the boi under his chin and stared into his deep grey eyes.

"Trust me," he pecked the boi's lips. "I know what I heard." Jacob let go of the boi's chin and turned dramatically.

"If anyone finds out about, us," he gestures at the three other bois. "Lives are at stake." The other boi places his hand in a fist on his chest and looks down with his eyes in a deep sigh.

"I know..." he states solemnly.

"Jacob!" A high-pitched squeal calls. Kailee.

"Hide!" Jacob Swhhdotorisu whisper shouts, and all of them duck behind chairs in the theater. Kailee runs around the exhibits, searching frantically for her boyfriend.

"Where are you?" She cries, her mascara dripping down her pink face. The bois all glance at each other, exchanging looks with many meanings. But Jacob had something to hide from Kailee , and it was more than just his romance with the other bois, it was much more...

To be continued


	8. Chapter 8

Veronica allowed the sparkling water to slip past her lips gently, savoring the sweet bubbles. She crossed the street with the rest of the Bus 1 group and the Fortnite squad trotted up ahead, too happily. One was being carried by the others and Veronica physically gagged. She looked behind her at Kailee who was to talking to a few of her friends excitedly. What they were talking about was a mystery. The bois hopped onto the bus and ran to the the bathroom on it, all of them, at the same time. Everyone filed onto the bus chattering about what they saw at the museum and laughing about new inside jokes that were created. They all shuffled to their seats and buckled up, as instructed by the bus driver. The bus engine started up and they were off. Kailee glanced around and noticed Jacob wasn't nearby.

"I-I don't think he actually loves me..." she cried to one of the teacher chaperones, Mr Queski. She sobbed into her hands. Kailee's heart was broken. The bus got two blocks away from the exploratorium, people were listening to songs and playing games with each other, and watching videos, and talking, and reading, when suddenly,

The bus lurched and quaked as it slammed into a pickup truck, destroying the truck and squishing it like a soda can as it flew through the air and crashed on top of multiple other cars in the big city. Janine flew forward, hitting her chest against a tray and breaking it, and fell unconscious.Kailee wasn't buckled, and she hit her head on the seat in front of her, hard enough to kill her. Screams were heRd from all over the bus as people checked their friends to see if they were okay. Penelope and Veronica were shook. Angelina 's cocacola bottle rolled across the ground and shattered. Kelly gasped. Lisa pulled out her earbuds in shock. Emelia slammed her book shut. Sasha held her armrests tightly. As the bus quivered and sputtered to the side of the road, someone finally asked; "What happened?"

Mr. S and the bus driver were clutching hands tightly.

"We hit a pickup truck, it swerved into us." Mr. S explained over the megaphone. The bus driver rolled his eyes.

"Stupid Toyotas." He grunted. Suddenly, three of the Fortnite bois ran out of the bathroom, sobbing and panting heavily.

"JACOB! WHYYYYYYYY" one yelled.

"He was so young..." another sniffled. The other was speechless and bawling into another boi's shirt.

"Kailee," Veronica muttered in shock, realizing she would be so heartbroken. Mr. Queski was checking her pulse, and shook his head. Everyone was too in shock to be sad. Suddenly, the sky darkened and rain hammered down on the bus top. Water began to fill the streets, and the water in the bay rose extremely flash.

"A FLASH FLOOD! WOAH!" Mr. S yelled, but no one could tell if he was fascinated or terrified. He clutched the bus driver and the bus driver clutched him. Penelope stroked her non-existent beard. The bus floated swiftly through the streets as car horns blared and lights flashed. Traffic lights were swept away and chaos reigned over the city, people screamed all around them and pedestrians swam through the streets. Everything shook and swerved as the bus was carried towards the bay. Suddenly, the water began to decrease, but the sky remained dark, and suddenly, the bus stopped. Suddenly, the doors swung open and two dark figures emerged from the darkness and stalked down the isle towards Penelope and Veronica . They stopped in front of them and Penelope and Veronica were paralyzed with fear.

"Oh how I've been waiting for this." Lil Gert pulled the hood off her head, revealing her incredible headdress. Fiona, behind her, also revealed herself. Veronica and Penelopes jaws dropped.

"LIL GERT?" Veronica screamed.

"FIONA FROM SHREK?!" Penelope gasped. Lil Gert chuckled and drew a knife from her back pocket. Veronica , who was closer to the isle, shrunk back into her seat cautiously.

"You see... you two created me, meaning you know too much. More than I would like." Lil Gert sneered.

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" Penelope screamed.

"I'm here to eliminate you." Lil Gert held the knife above her head. Thinking quickly, Veronica whipped a spoon out of her pocket. Lil Gert screeched in horror and stumbled backward, cracking the window behind her.

"That's right Lil Gert! We created you! Meaning we also know your weakness!" Veronica screamed. Fiona rolled her eyes.

"But you don't know mine." She yelled, lunging at Veronica and gripping her neck. Veronica gasped for air.

"EYE GOUGE!" Penelope yelled, sticking her thumbs in Fiona's eyes. Fiona howled and scrambled out the broken window. Lil Gert pursed her lips. The ruby tumbled out of her pocket and rolled across the floor to Veronica .

"What the-" Veronica started. Lil Gert lunged for the ruby but Penelope swiped it up before she could grab it. Veronica held the spoon out firmly, and Lil Gert stumbled back yet again.

"GIVE THE BACK!" She squeaked.

"NO!" Veronica voice cracked.

"WHAT IS THIS." Penelope demanded.

"I-it's...it's..." Lil Gert stuttered.

"TELL US." Penelope yelled.

"IT'S THE FOURTH ELEMENT! OKAY! I TOLD YOU. NOW LET ME HAVE IT." She screamed.

"The...forth element?" Veronica asked.

"But there are only three..." Penelope trailed off. Lil Gert shook her head, still scowling.

"What does it do?" Penelope asked. Lil Gert rolled her eyes.

"Duh. It does the same thing as the broach, but only once. It also has another power." She told them.

"And that is..?" Veronica asked. Lil Gert rolled her eyes.

"It gives people amnesia." Veronica and Penelope looked at each other. "But I'm immune. Obviously. And... you are too." She shrugged. Everyone in the bus gasped in unison. Penelope and Veronica both touched the gem, and suddenly, everyone in the bus forgot about everything relating to Lil Gert as she fled. Suddenly, the ruby was transformed into a smaller version of itself, and it embedded itself in Veronicas cafeteria spoon. Veronica examined her new bedazzled utensil.

"What were the elements again?" Veronica asked Penelope .

"The broach, this spoon, Barry Bee Benson's magic hairpin and..." Penelope started.

"Jacob Sartoriusosusus's ashes anklet." Veronica and Penelope said in unison. They all smelled something burning from the back of the bus, the bathroom. The Fortnite bois are gone. Jacob Sattsttrtstattous died in the bathroom. The Fortnite bois were there. Veronica and Penelope sprinted to the back of the bus and whipped the door open. Jacob's ashes were being placed in an anklet Kailee owned by the Fortnite bois. They look up and screamed, then ran back to their seats with the anklet. Penelope and Veronica stared blankly at the embers of the fire as they got put it out. Then they both rolled their eyes.

"I can't believe this. What have we done? Our fanfiction has done so much..." Veronica began.

"I know what we have to do, Veronica ." Penelope responded grimly.

"What?" Veronica asked cluelessly. Penelope looked at Veronica .

"Write more."

To be continued


	9. Chapter 9

After Penelope and Veronica made the bus forget about Lil Gert and Fiona, the remaining Fortnite bois passed the Ashes Anklet to them.

"We don't know what this is, do you want it?" They asked. Veronica and Penelope now posses the power of the Spoon and the Ashes Anklet, along with the greatest power of all... writing fanfiction.

Penelope twiddled the anklet in her fingers as policemen roamed up and down the bus isle identifying the situation. Veronica fiddled with the spoon. The chief of police sauntered over to Mr. S and whispered something in his ear. Mr. S nodded and clasped his hands together.

"Alright everyone listen up!" He called. "The Policemen are going to go around the bus and ask you all a few questions, so just be sure to answer their questions honestly and politely. Thanks!" Penelope and Veronica looked at each other.

"What do we do? What do we say?" Veronica asks. Penelope rolls her eyes.

"We lie, obviously." She responded. Veronica rolled her eyes.

"Fine." She responded.

The policemen wandered around interrogating students left and right. They asked about deaths and injuries and students answered honestly, except for Veronica and Penelope .

"Do you know anything about Kailee and Jacob Sarrrrrrrtorius?" The cop asked.

"No sir." Veronica answered. A student bumped into the police officer.

"Hey be careful there, don't bump me. Especially not on my gun side." Veronica and Veronica couldn't help but laugh. Who calls it a gun side?

The cop asked a few more questions and then trailed around and collected more info.

"Alright everyone listen up!" The chief called out. Everyone quieted down immediately.

"I will now alert you all of what happened. Janine was not wearing her seatbelt, and she crashed into her tray, which knocked her into a coma," Janine was carries out on a stretcher. "Kailee had a condition where when she had what the kids call a "broken heart" she would grow weak and feeble, and when she crashed she was in that state, meaning she had a higher risk of dying," Kailees body was carried away in a sack. "Jacob Sartrtroutiroous was..." the police officer looks at the Fortnite bois, who shake their heads violently. "In an...awkward position when he passed. His body wasn't found though." Whispers arose from tje crowd of people and rumours spread like the plague.

"QUIET!" The police chief hushes. "We will be conducting no more research, but you still cannot leave for another hour or two because we need to repair the bus. Thank you for you're time." And then he and his crew left.

Penelope and Veronica slouched back into their seats, and Penelope whipped and then whipped out her phone, opening the Notes app.

"Ready?" Penelope asked.

"Sure I guess." Veronica responded. Penelopes fingers flew across the keyboard like birds across a lake. She dudn't stop for nothing, not even spelling erorrs or grammar mistakes. Penelope typed for hours as Veronica caught some shut eye.

About an hour or two later

After Penelope had finished the second chapter, she presented it to Veronica , Sasha, and Emma. They laughed about it as they read and Penelope smiled proudly.

"This is incredible," Emma stated in a state of awe. Veronica whispered to Penelope ;

"If what happened in the first chapter came true, what will happen to this one? Will Emma be killed by a gang of muppets?" Veronica asked worriedly.

"Of course not," Penelope psshed.

"Okay..." Veronica rubbed her shoulder as if she had an injury there, but really she was just nervous. Penelope began to type chapter 3 as Veronica spat out ideas, and the bus started again. Everyone cheered and hollered except for the Fortnite bois, who were still grieving the loss of their team carrier. Veronica and Penelope smiled at each other and high fived. They were going home.

The next day, everyone arrived at school exhausted, even though they had an extra hour of sleep because it was late start Wednesday. Everything went on, for the most part, normally, except for the fact that the Fortnite Bois were still grieving, along with kailee's friends. Janine's friends visited her in the hospital in the morning before school, but she wasn't awake yet.

Veronica twiddled to spoon in her fingers. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Will you stop flashing that everywhere? Someone's going to ask eventually." She explained.

"Sorry." Veronica rolled her eyes and placed the spoon into her backpack. No one else was at the table, but still, Penelope spoke in a hushed voice.

"Why would Lil Gert need to kill us? She said we knew too much about her, but what's so important to know about her that we would need to be eliminated for?" She asked

"I don't know, maybe she wants more clothes?" Veronica joked. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Now's not the time for jokes." She stated. Veronica rolled her eyes.

"Just trying to lighten up the mood." She rolled her eyes. Penelope glanced at her phone case, not noticing that Lil Gert had disappeared from it before the bus crashed. Penelope sighed.

"We have to figure out what's happening." She said solemnly. Veronica nodded in agreement.

In Orchestra

Penelope sat in the music room with many people, but was separated from Veronica , the other element holder. She rolled her eyes as she unpacked her oak violin and glanced over at Emma who was rosining the bow to her cello. Penelope sat in her seat as the bell rang so she wouldn't lose points. Sasha sat behind her one row. Mr. B, the music teacher, began his 34343434 hour long talk and Penelope and Emma laughed silently as they mouthed "34" to each other across the room. Don't ask what 34 is. Mr. B rambled on and on and yelled at A group of annoying boys a few times when suddenly, a loud helicopter flew over the roof and barely missing it. Everyone sat in shock. Penelope had seen a figure in the helicopter. A green frog-like figure that appeared to be a puppet. No, not a puppet, a muppet.

"THE MUPPETS!" She blurted out as Mr. B ran to the Vice Principal to investigate. Emma ducked under the piano as the helicopter swooped around another time. Now a copter headlight was shining through the window. Penelope crossed the room and yanked Emma's arm.

"COME ON!" Penelope yelled.

"WAIT!" Emma yelled back, pointing at the skylight. Penelope looked up as a ladder crashed through the ceiling and the screaming began. Emma patted her pocket and grabbed Penelopes arm, breaking into a sprint towards the front of the school. Penelopes last glimpse of the room as they ran was Kermit the Frog attacking Sasha , and she let out a screech as they ran towards The office. Emma made a sharp turn and swung the doors open. Obviously, she couldn't say what was really happening, they would never believe her. Instead, she presented a fair claim.

"Hi, we're from Leadership. Are we allowed to use the PA shstem to call someone to the front please?"

"Go ahead." An office lady said. The two speedwalked to the nurse's office and picked up the PA thingy, switching it on, and the chime rang throughout the school.

"Veronica, please come to the front kffice, Veronica Smith, please come to the front office, thank you." She hung it up quick and sprinted with Penelope to meet Veronica halfway.

"What is it?" Veronica panted. Penelope yanked her arm and pulled her towards the music room as Emma ran off the campus towards the park. They darted in and muppets surrounded the place with guns, searching and prodding and invading everyone's privacy. Sasha was on the ground, blood trickling from her forehead. Not dead, luckily, just knocked out by Kermit's gun. As Veronica and Penelope stepped into the room, all the Muppets pointed their guns at them. Veronica held the spoon out in front of her and Penelope reached for the anklet. She gasped.

"Veronica , where's the anklet?" She whisper screamed.

"I don't know, did you drop it?"

"Maybe?"

"Check Lost and Found."

Ms. Piggy crossed the floor and clicked the trigger against Veronicas head.

"Ms. Piggy! No!" Kermit yelled. Veronica touched the ruby and all the muppets fell into a daze of confusion. All of them, except Uncle Deadly, who held his palm up defensively.

"I would be careful how you use that thing," he stated as the other muppets climbed back into the helicopter. "You wouldn't want to confuse the wrong person." He stated mysteriously. He gripped the ladder as the helicopter took off, carrying him away with it. Everyone sat in silence with their jaws dropped.

Suddenly, the classroom erupted with noise. People were screaming and yelling and pulling out their phones. Veronica and Penelope both grappled the spoon, and everyone in the room became confused, and all sat in the wrong seats. Mr. B sauntered back in.

"Let's tune." He stated, and the class continued with Sasha still knocked out on the ground.

Lunch

Emma was nowhere to be seen, so Veronica and Penelope snuck off campus and ran to the psrk silently. When the arrived, they searched everywhere. The slides, the swings, the tunnels, everywhere. But Emma was nowhere to be found. Penelope tapped her chin and rolled her eyes. Veronica scratched her head. Penelope realized something.

"Wait a second, Veronica , I think Emma stole my anklet."

"What?"

"Before we left she patted her pocket, and my anklet wasn't missing until then." Penelope and Veronica widened their eyes. Penelope tried to call Emma , but it instantly went to voicemail.

"What do we do?" She asked. Veronica pushed up her glasses.

"We have to find her." Veronica responded. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Duh genius, how?"

"I think our best bet is talking to Sasha ." Veronica responded, and they ran back to school.


	10. Chapter 10

Penelope and Veronica creeped into the music room, where Sasha sat on the ground staring off into space. At least she was awake again.

"Sasha ?" Penelope inquired. Sasha blinked, but remained in her blank state.

"Saaasshaaa?" Veronica tried. No answer.

"Earth to Sasha ?" Penelope rolled her eyes. Sasha was unmoving. Veronica waved her hand in front of Sasha's face.

"Maybe the amnesia hit her too hard?" Penelope asked. Veronica shook her head.

"I don't think so..." she rubbed her chin.

"Well maybe the gun was-" Sasha screeched at the word gun and through her hand over her head wound, ducking behind a marimba.

"Woah there!" Veronica yelled. Sasha muttered something to herself about Kermit.

"Sasha, what happened?" Penelope tried. Sasha shook her head and continued muttering. Veronica and Penelope looked at each other worriedly.

"Wait! I think I know what to do!" Penelope got up and crossed the room, ripping off a Gerald from Finding Dory stapled to the wall. She ran back and held it up to Sasha's eye level. Sasha suddenly calmed down.

"Kermit...he...he attacked me..." she trailed off. She gripped the paper Gerald and squeezed her eyes shut.

"Here, this might help." Veronica rubbed the ruby and there was a flash, but Sasha still was under the shock of the attack.

"What? It didn't work?" Penelope questioned. Veronica shrugged, confused .

"Sasha, what do you know about Lil Gert?" Veronica interrogated.

"S-she tried to kill you two. And she caused the crash. Her fashion is the reason Emma told me she was going to kill her, because Lil Gert is trying to kill her way to the top of the fashion world!" Sasha thrashed and shuddered and held onto Penelopes shoulder tightly. Penelope and Veronica looked at each other.

"Did emme tell you HOW she planned to kill her?" Penelope asked. Sasha shook her head.

"She did say she was going to Fresno though..." Veronica and Penelope looked at each other.

"Looks like we're going to Fresno." Penelope shrugged. Veronica rolled her eyes.

"How in the heck are we supposed to get there?" Veronica asked.

"Just trust me, okay?" Penelope rolled her eyes. "Meet me outside the school at 7 pm." Veronica raised her eyebrows.

"That seems a little sketchy..." Veronica exclaimed but Penelope just rolled her eyes again.

"Trust me." Penelope reassured her. Veronica scratched the back of her neck.

"Okay." She said finally.

7 PM

Penelope paced outside the school building impatiently. Veronica was so slow. She rolled her eyes just as Veronica jogged up, wearing a neon green jacket and dark orange khakis.

"Where were you?" Penelope hissed. Veronica gave an apologetic look.

"I was asleep! Sorry, I forgot." She retorted. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, just follow me. Sneakily." Penelope wore an all black romper, but Veronica's bright outfit might gave them away. Penelope snuck up the side side of a car door. The keys were still in it. Veronica gasped.

"How did you know those would be there?" Veronica stammered, impressed. Penelope smiled smugly.

"The person who lives here iso so forgetful, sometimes she leaves her front door wide open during the night. I'm surprised she hasn't been murdered by a serial killer yet." Penelope pulled the key's out of the side of the door and crawled into the car, Veronica hopping into the passenger seat. They both buckled up and closed their doors. Aviva started up the engine and put the car out of park.

"Have you driven a car before?" Veronica asked.

"In Mario Kart, so pretty much, yeah." Penelope responded, stepping heavily on the gas. The car zoomed forwards, hitting a trashcan. She backed up the car and zoomed forward again, veering a little bit more left than before. After a few bumps and awkward turns, they made it to the freeway. They were determined to make it to Fresno, hopefully without getting pulled over. After about an hour of reckless driving, Veronica finally asked;

"Do you even know how to get to Fresno?"

"No. Pull up Google Maps." Penelope responded. Veronica pulled up a map on her phone and set it to Fresno State University. They sped along the freeway and Veronica yawned. Penelope might be a reckless driver, but she still felt quite tired in the car.

"You know," she muttered as she drifted off to sleep. "We could have just taken an Uber." Penelope slammed her head against the horn in fury. She brought her head back up and rolled her eyes.

"Why didn't you say something before?!" She yelled at Veronica . Veronica shrugged and fell asleep. Penelope rolled her eyes again , bringing her focus back to the road.

At Fresno State

"WAKE UP!" Penelope yelled, throwing water on Veronica . She jerked awake, soaking wet. Penelope rolled her eyes. Veronica rolled her eyes. A bug on the windshield rolled its eyes.

"If you were Emma , where would you go?" Penelope asked. Veronica yawned. Aviva groaned.

"Well I would probably go to the library to look at yearbooks and find out who everyone is." Veronica answered. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"IT'S A COLLEGE. THEY DON'T HAVE YEARBOOKS YOU IDIOT." Penelope yelled.

"Don't they though?!" Veronica asked in confusion. Penelope thought for a moment.

"Ok... let's go to the library then." Penelope responded. They found a map at the front building of the school and then followed it to the library. They swung open the doors and there she was, sitting at a table reading a book about Psychology. Veronica and Penelope nodded at each other and Penelope crept around behind Emma unsuspiciously and Veronica approached her directly. The two sat on either side of Emma , Veronica with the spoon held to Emma's face. Emma looked up at both of them and closed her book.

"I knew you two would follow me." She stated monotonously.

Authors note- Sorry for the kind of short chapter... I've been busy lately, but I am almost finished with the next few and they are long and juicy. Also, if you are wondering "isn't this a Harry Potter fic? Harry Potter related stuff hasn't been mentioned since, like, chapter four", Do not worry! The characters you know and love will return soon.


	11. Chapter 11

"What?" Veronica asked. Emma seemed very calm.

"You can put the spoon down. It won't do anything." She suggested to Veronica , standing up and grabbing a book titled "Psychology 101" she flipped through it and showed it to Veronica and Penelope .

"This section's all about brainal function. See this? This is the frontal lobe." Emma told them, tapping a part of the brain. Penelope rolled her eyes.

"What does this have to do with anything?" She asked impatiently. Emma rolled her eyes.

"Well," Emma began. "The frontal lobe controls many things, including memory. People with lager frontal lobes aren't affected by the spoon. And you know quite a few people." Emma finished. Penelope and Veronica glanced at each other.

"Like who?" Veronica asked.

"Sasha and I, Janine, Debra, Lisa, Kelly, Angelina, obviously Lil Gert, and you two." Veronica and Penelope gasped.

"You mean, everyone in our group??" Penelope asked. Emma nodded and sat back down in her chair. Veronica and Penelope followed her lead.

"Wait." Veronica quaked. "Why are you really trying to kill Lil Gert?" she asked with intensity. Emma chuckled.

"You really think I'm going to spill you my whole plank to you?" Emma scoffed. Veronica and Penelope were shook. Emma sneered.

"You guys are a little thick in the brisbs still I guees." She shrugged, standing and swiveling on her heel, waltzing out of the library. Veronica and Penelope looked at each other concernedly.

"Do we follow her?" Veronica asked. Penelope shook her head.

"Then...what?" Veronica asked. Suddenly, the Muppet's helicopter swooped over the top of the library. Penelope and Veronica both ran out of the library. Once they were out, Penelope yelled:

"Follow that chopper!" The two sprinted and panted and look ahead to see Emma sprinting across an open field.

"What's she doing?!?!?" Veronica screeched. Penelope stared in awe as Emma did some weird hops and dance moves and jumped over some loose patches of dirt. The muppet skydived out of the helicopter and pulled their parachutes landing outside thr dirt patches. Emma grinned cheekily. Veronica and Penelope snuck closer and ducked behind a conveniently placed wall. The two peered out from behind it and watched the argument.

"Move away from there!" Kermit ordered. Emma shook her head and rolled her eyew.

"Move, now!" Mrs. Piggy yeleld.

"No!" Emma yelled back, and threw her bandaid box at her. Ms. Piggy gasped and fell to the ground.

"Why aren't they just attacking her?" Veronica asked in a whisper. Penelope rolled her eyes and pointed.

"Land mines." She exclaimed. Veronica raised her eyebrows. Emma rolled her eyes.

"It's time I reveal to you why I have you trapped here." Emma grinned. The muppets looked at each other concernedly. Emma revealed thr ashes anklet and lifted her leg to the sky gracefully.

"No!" The muppets screamedz they scattered and ran in different direcions just as Jacob Sartorius' sweatshirt played. Penelope and Veronica covered their ears seiftly.

"So she DID have my anklet!" Penelope yelled over the nosie. Veronica nodded ad she plugged her ears. The muppets dropped to the ground quickly, either dead pr knocked out, they could n't tell which. Emma lowered her leg and the music stopped playing.

"Penelope ! Veronica !" She yelled across the open field. "C'mon! Jacob's waiting!"

Veronica and Penelope glanced at each other.

"What?!" Veronica yeleld back. Penelope slapped her hand over Veronicas mouth.

"Shut up! Will you?" She rolled her eyes. Veronica pushed Penelopes hand off her motuth. Veronica walked out into the open field and began to trot towards Emma's landmjmnes. She got o the outside of the patted dirt ring and Emma disarmed the mines.

"Jacob's waiting." Emma repeated. Veronica looked confused.

"Jacob'd desd." She said. Emma roleld her eyes.

"That's what he wants everyone to think, but I knoe the truth. C'mon." She stated, pulling a sewer lid open. Penelope jogged actoss the field and panted heavily. She was tired.

"Deadly!" Emma yelled into the sky. Veronica and Penelope believe she'd bonkers. Uncle Deadly, one of the muppets and former moopets, jumped out of a helicopter passing over and landed by then. Penelope punched him in the face.

"He's a muppet!!" Penelope yeleld. Emma rolled her eyes.

"No. He's one of us." She reassured them. Veronica and Penelope look at each other, skeptical, but continued on. They hopped into the sewer, Uncle Deadly and Emma behind them, and began the descent to the sweage grounds.

Penelope , Veronica , Emma, and Uncle Deadly dropped to the ground, where there was water surrounded them on either side. Emma looked at the others.

"The rest of the squad will be here soon. Don't worry." She told them. Shortly afer they started moving, they heard the sewer lid above them open, and Sasha, Debra, Lisa, Kelly, and Angelina dropped to the ground.

"Sasha! You're alright!" Caroline exclaimed.

"Thank Raôkmé!" Penelope cheered. They pulled Sasha in a tight embrace.

"Nice reunion, but we can't forget why we're here." Uncle Deadly reminded them.

"Is it true Jacob's still alive?" Debra asked. Emma nodded.

"How is that even possible?" Janine asked. Emma beckoned for everyone to follow her, and they started down towards the center of the sewer, about a quarter mile walk. Everyone whispered among themdelves as they walked. They had a lot to catch up on.

"Wait, so, Emma stole your anklet?" Lisa asked Penelope . Penelope nodded.

"But it was for a good reason." She told them. Everyone nodded as understanding.

"Welcome." Uncle deadly stated. "To the center of the sewer." Rats scuttled around their feet as Deadly pulled the drapes to the side, revealing a large crowd of strange animals, people, and animals that look like people. Mutants.

There were some strange looking turtles there (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles), and some regular looking people, except they were blue (Avatar). The squad glanced around without looking at one thing too long. They don't know what it's like down here, they don't know their culture or their customs. It's best not to stare though, probably. Everyone in the room screeched-not squealed, literally screeched- as Jacob Sartorisusuos entered the room. He wore actual sweage chunks in his hat, and his outfit was made entirely of seaweed. Big, fat rats carried him into the room, squeaking as they ran. They set him down and scurried away.

"LISTEN UP!" His baby voice called across the center of the sewer. Everyone in the room quieted down instantaneously.

"MAKE WAY, FOR THE NEW CO-LEADERSOFTHE SEWER!" Everyone clapped and cheered and made a tunnel for the squad. "EMMA! SASHA! UNCLE DEADLY! VERONICA, PENELOPE, (insert the rest of squad names, there are too many to type) AND OF COURSE, TAYLOR! (Taylor Swift)" Everyone waltzed down the isle as the crowd clapped and cheered. They made their way to a stage and waved at the people of the sewers.

"AS A REBELLION OF PURE REMEMBERERS, WE MUST STAND UP AGAINST LIL GERT AND HER ARMY OF EVIL REMEMBERERS, AND MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS WE RULE THIS WORLD. WE'RE IN THIS FOR THE FORGETTERS, AND THEIR PROTECTION!" Jacob Sararararsraris called. Everyone screamed with agreement.

"So this is the rebellion." Veronica said to herself. "This is where they are." She thought.

"OUR PLAN WILL COMMENCE TOMORROW NIGHT! BE READY FOR ACTION EVERYONE. BE PREPARED." With that, water rushed into the room to signal the end of the meeting, and everyone went their seperate ways.

"This way." Jacob Sarrrrrrrtor lead them all into a room directly connected to the center of the sewer.

"What's happening tomorrow night?" Angelina asked.

"The destruction of Lil Gert and her base." Jacob Sarrrrrrrtrtrtrtrtorrrrisu stated coolly. Everyone gasped.

"Wait, I didn't know this..." Emma said.

"I know. Because I'm just now telling you." Jacob Sasaas said.

"Oh." Emma said.

"Tomorrow night, everyone will attack Lil Gert's death star (Star Wars) at the same time. However, you guys will sneak around back and defeat Lil Gert herself, even though you'll have to go through Lil Tay." Jacob Ass stated.

"Lil Tay?!" Debra exclaimed.

"Oh no..." Kelly said.

"Lil Gert has an army. If we don't do this quickly, they'll have time to fight back. You guys have to go up there. You'll be provided with everything you need. Any questions?" Jacob Saaaaaaaat asked.

"Yeah, actually. How did you survive the crash?" Penelope asked. Jacob Sthfdfgjhtt sighed.

"I-I knew I needed to escape before Lil Gert's attack, so I cut off my hand and then escaped by flushing myself down the toilet. I did the hand thing so that my Fortnite bros had something to remember me by, but obviously that didn't work, they're Forgetters. They don't remember anything about the anklet at all. Also, without a hand I can't do musical.lys, so why not just go live in the sewer?" Tears welled up in his eyes and he dried them quickly.

"AnywYs. The real reason why Lil Gert attzcked you was because she knew you were Remembereres, and she wants to be the one in power. With you guys there, she can't do that." Jacob explained.

"Wow." Veronica said.

"Now get some rest, we hsve a big day tonorrow. He said, leading them to their dormitory.

"Goodnight." He said.


End file.
